Become aware of the impacts of your behaviour and how your desire to defeat others, get back at them or annoy them creates yet further uncomfortable feelings for yourself. Thus the aggressive intent is cloaked by the passive method. The customer agrees that this is just what they want, but when it comes to signing the order, they find reasons why they cannot buy today. They agree but do not actually do what they agreed to do. Passive aggression often appears when a person is asked to do something which they want to avoid for some reason such as priority of other work. A more severe form of passive aggression is to agree to commitments and then not do anything to fulfil them.
Consequences of Passive Aggressive Behaviour In being passive aggressive you are not giving yourself or others an opportunity to listen to what you think or feel. Passive aggression is when the behaviour is more persistent and repeats periodically, where there are ongoing patterns of negative attitudes and passive resistance in personal relationships or work situations. Evading problems and issues, burying an angry head in the sand. Victimisation Unable to look at their own part in a situation will turn the tables to become the victim and will behave like one. Passive aggression is a destructive pattern of behaviour that can be seen as a form of emotional abuse in relationships that bites away at trust between people. A passive aggressive might not always show that they are angry or resentful. When on the receiving end of passive aggression, you can feel confused, upset, offended, guilty and frustrated. When someone keeps avoiding making commitments or appears to make a commitment to you but somehow does not comply, then you need to change the situation, otherwise you will not get anything done. Self-Pity the poor me scenario. Not going along with things. Passive aggression might be seen as a defence mechanism that people use to protect themselves. This can also happen in a culture where it is impolite to say 'no' to a person's face. The worker might sulk, make faces, scowl inwardly when given jobs to do or may agree politely and then take ages to do them. It might be automatic and might stem from early experiences. Sulking Being silent, morose, sullen and resentful in order to get attention or sympathy. They agree but do not actually do what they agreed to do. Stay strong and focused and get on with your life in a positive way. Become aware of the underlying feelings causing your behaviour. Deviation must be stable and of long duration. Example A person at a meeting is asked to complete a task with which they feel unable to comply. A more severe form of passive aggression is to agree to commitments and then not do anything to fulfil them. A sales person uses a persuasive sales patter. It is where you are angry with someone but do not or cannot tell them. Thus the aggressive intent is cloaked by the passive method. At the end of the meeting, they still have not agreed to do anything. An example of a child rebelling might be around toilet training, withdrawing from family conversation, choosing subjects at school to please parents and then not working hard, around eating and mealtimes - all causing worry and upset to the parents who may have no idea their behaviour is a contributory cause to the problem.
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